if you eat ice cream, you'll get pregnant.

It's true, claims the new book "The Fertility Diet" put out by Harvard. Right, and I think I can get pregnant through my belly button...

positions and reasons

From the precious book "Birth: An Anthology of Ancient Texts, Songs, Prayers and Stories" edited by David Meltzer.

"The Position of the Private Parts

At the beginning of the world it had been the Creator's intention to place both men's and women's genitals on their foreheads so that they might be able to procreate children easily. But the otter made a mistake in conveying the message to that effect; and that is how the genitals came to be in the inconvenient place they are now in.

(Translated literally. Told by Ishanashte, 12th July, 1886. Ainu/Northern Islands of Japan.)"

This was told to Basil H. Chamberlain, a British Japanologist active in the 19th century who did some of the earliest translations of Japanese haiku into English, like this one:

The old pond, aye! And the sound of a frog leaping into the water.

part two: where do babies come from?

Here's the second installation on the topic.

Featuring: THE STORK!

The stork method of delivery is most definitely a popular myth in America. Dutch, German and Scandinavian mothers would tell this tale to their children as explanation for the presence of their new siblings. Since the women usually took a few days of bed rest following birth, they would also add that when the stork came it bit the pregnant mother in the leg, causing her to stay in bed. Storks are one of the strongest and most loving of all the birds. The English word stork comes from the Greek storge' meaning "strong and natural affection". These tenderhearts have been seen giving special care to the fragile members of their flock. The stork's migration sealed the deal. Before migratory patterns were recognized the mysterious absence was thought to be the period when the stork went to get the new babies.
I think I really believed this once. I remember driving in California and seeing so many seagulls. I must have thought they were storks because I just knew that they were going to delivery all the babies in the world, they were just hanging out by the beach having a vacation.